Shirley's Articles / Speaking with Confidence

2 Steps To Speaking Up Without Stress

Imagine, you’re in a meeting. You’ve got an insight to share. You wait for the right moment: maybe a pause in the conversation. You listen carefully as others exchange ideas back and forth. Finally, the right moment comes! You lean forward and open your mouth… and then you close it. The meeting ends, and you haven’t shared your valuable insight.

Why is it so hard to speak up? We’re good at our job. We’ve got ideas to share, but when it comes to sticking our neck out and saying what we think, we often keep quiet. It’s all about fear, isn’t it? It’s the fear of making mistakes and looking foolish. Speaking up in front of others can feel downright stressful!

Here’s a simple 2-step trick to take the stress away.

1. Set your expectations low

Setting expectations low gives you the confidence to speak up. It doesn’t mean your words are unimportant! It simply removes any obligation to blow everyone’s minds with what you’re about to say.

Mentally position what you’re about to say as adding to the content. Decide that what you’re about to say is like a valuable spice you’re adding to a dish – it’s not the main ingredient.

2. Have a few starter phrases ready

Set the tone before you share. These phrases convey the feeling that you’re about to add a spice and not the main ingredient. They give you confidence to get your foot in the door.

“Can I add something here? It won’t apply to everyone but it may be important to some of you.”

“Can I share my thoughts here? I’ve got something to say that might be worth considering.”

“I’m not as familiar as some of you with this, but can I share what I’ve noticed. It might be useful.”

“I’ve been listening carefully and I have a comment that might give a different viewpoint.”

Speaking up in a meeting can feel like a big deal. You can reduce the stress by turning it into a small deal and having the first few words ready. These two steps will help make sure that when the meeting ends, your valuable insights have been heard!

Article written by Marianna Pascal

All articles are copyright © Shirley Taylor. All rights reserved. This information may not be distributed, sold, publicly presented, or used in any other manner, except as described here.

Permission to reprint all or part of any article in your magazine, e-zine, website, blog or organisation newsletter is granted, as long as:

  1. The entire credit line below is included*.
  2. The website link to is clickable (live)**.
  3. You send a copy, PDF, or link of the work in which the article is used when published.

This credit line must be reprinted in its entirety to use any articles by Shirley Taylor:

* Credit line:
© Shirley Taylor.
Shirley is an international bestselling author. She has established herself as a leading authority in email and business writing skills. Her international bestseller Model Business Letters, Emails & Other Business Documents 7th edition sold over half a million copies worldwide and has been translated into 17 languages. Her book Email Essentials reached #2 in the USA for publishers Marshall Cavendish International. Find out more about Shirley at

** The website link to must be clickable to receive permission to reprint the article.